How to Get UnStuck When we Feel Overwhelmed? Lord of the Rings

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When life feels overwhelming, we may feel stuck with frustration. At such times how to get unstuck?

In the Lord of the Rings, Gandalf tells Frodo about the power and the evil of the Ring and what was at stake. Frodo feel overwhelmed by the task at hand and says, "I wish this did not happen in my time."

This is something we all can empathize with at many levels. We wish the pandemic did not happen in our time. We may with the breakup did not happen to us or the job loss did not happen to us. We may feel so frustrated at the misfortunes and be in a state of wishful thinking and pinning. This kind of pinning can itself become a form of escapism, keeping us stuck in wishful thinking.

How does Gandalf respond to this?

He does 2 things...

Firstly, Gandalf says, "So do I... so do all who see such times." What is Gandalf doing here? Gandalf shows empathy. Gandalf empathizes with Frodo's pain, he does not deny the pain.

Secondly, Gandalf says, "But this is not for them to decide." None can choose what will or will not happen to them. Gandalf is not a fatalist who says we have to just accept fate. He adds, "We have to decide what to do with the time we have been given us." This is important. Gandalf reframes the situation by telling Frodo that he still has the power to choose how to respond to this situation. He still has agency to perform a meaningful action.

From a theological perspective this agency is important because it is a part of what it means to be made in God's image. God gave Adam and Eve agency to take care of the garden. When we live into our agency to take meaningful action that is when we are living into our human edge.

From a psychological perspective this is called behavioral activation. When someone feels depressed the psychologist may ask them to take some action whether it is going for a walk or writing in a journal. Frodo here is in a depressed state, and Gandalf does a form of behavioral activation.

In our life to we may find situations where we are overwhelmed by the things around us at those times instead of being stuck in a place of analysis-paralysis, we could follow Gandalf's format and do two things

1) Have empathy for our situation, have compassion on our own state. Jesus has compassion for us, so can we.

2) Take a meaningful spiritual action to respond to the situation whether that be to pray about what is bothering us, or journaling about it, or talking to a spiritual friend or just going for a walk.

When life seems overwhelming and you feel stuck in a state of frustration, to get unstuck, start with empathy follow up with meaningful response by celebrating your agency to choose and you would be following on Frodo’s footsteps, bravely matching to Mordor!